Sweeping Away Malice, Finding Myself

After I got close to a friend, she always seemed to harbor this subtle malice toward me. When I bought a new coat, she blurted out that it made me look like a wild boar, then immediately covered her mouth and said she was only joking. When we passed the discounted food section, she grabbed my arm. “None of this is fresh anymore. Lingling, you really need to stop being so cheap.” I hadn’t even been planning to buy anything. I wanted to call her out, but she had already moved on with a grin, chatting about something else. But overall, she was pretty good to me, and we had a great relationship. I was the only one constantly tearing myself apart over it. I went to my boyfriend for help. He just smiled at me. “It’s not that bad, is it? I feel like you’re being too sensitive.” “Baby, you look so cute when you’re worried! Come here, give me a kiss!” So I went to my mom. She frowned. “See? I told you people in big cities are all rotten. You can’t handle them. Wouldn’t it be better to stay by your dad’s and my side?” Why did my boyfriend and my mom have that same subtle malice too? Out of options, I ran into an upperclassman. She gave me a knowing smile. “Every relationship is a power relationship.” Then she looked me up and down, kindly. “And you radiate doormat energy from head to toe. Of course people will try to get one over on you without even thinking.” I panicked. “Really? Then what should I do?” My upperclassman smiled with confidence. “There’s still hope. Just do exactly what I tell you…”